Drat

The game went about like I figured, but I really hoped Coach Brooks could finish with a win since I think this was his last game.
Instead all the streaks ended: the bowl winning streak, the non-conference winning streak, and most importantly, my perfect point spread record picking Wildcats games this season.

I think this loss proved me right in my analysis of UK's lousy passing game. I've been defending the play-calling all year against fans who are frustrated because of the lack of down-field passing.
These fans insisted Kentucky needs to 'open it up' more. I think the coaches would like to do so, but the offensive line can't hold blocks long at all, the quarterbacks are very shaky, and the receivers are even worse.
Tonight the QB played well, finally (or well by my lowered standards), scrambled and bought tons of time even with a bad line- but the receivers still could not get open and then could not catch passes in the rare instances when they did shake free.

Oh well. I think UK's in pretty good shape for next season, all things considered. And Newton did look like a very, very good freshman QB tonight.

Randall Cobb is a great player, but I'm baffled every time announcers call him a great receiver. He drops more balls than he catches. I'm not that worried about it because he's still a very inexperienced receiver since he was a qb in high school and he spends so much practice time doing other things. He has good hands but not yet good habits.
_______________________________________________________________
And I'm 7-3 on my bowl pick'em so far. Not great, but not awful, and most of my high point games are not until week.

Music City Bowl

As of my point spread check last night, Clemson is a 7 1/2 point favorite.
I don't feel at all positive about Kentucky's chances of winning tomorrow, but the spread is large enough that I think I can continue my trend this season: take Kentucky and the points, but I don't think the Cats will win.
And again I think the score will be in the mid-twenties. I'll go with a 27-23 Clemson victory.


I did not know Christian Laettner played football for Clemson.

Thoughts From The Fashion Guy

-I hate neckties. Ties are uncomfortable and they serve no functional purpose. They get in the way. I suppose it is feasible I could someday use a necktie to hide a stain on my shirt, but so far all I've ever done is get stains on the neckties.

-I do not hate earrings, but I absolutely, totally do not understand them, on either women or men. Who first said "You know what? I bet it would look really cool if I gouged a hole in my head and dangled a piece of metal from it!" And who said "Hey, that does look cool!"

-I feel pretty much the same about all other piercings. Okay, I've seen some women who look great with pierced navels, but I think they would have looked pretty good with or without the piercing.

-Other jewelry is alright, I guess, but I don't really understand it. And toe rings? Seriously?

-I hate shaving. Shaving is a daily hassle; there are places on my neck, ears, and under my nose that seem geometrically impossible to shave, and yet I continue to try because the only thing worse than shaving my face is NOT shaving my face. I try that periodically but it looks awful and itches.

-Almost all sweaters are hot and uncomfortable. Sweaters do, however, extend the life of a shirt by a year or two. Thank you, George Costanza.

-Most clothing seems reasonably priced, with a gradual price increase for products of higher quality and with a wide variety of stops in between dirt-cheap and arm-and-a-leg. For instance, I can get a shirt for $12.99, or $20.99, or $39.99, or $59.99, etc., all the way up to the $40,000 Eton Diamond shirt (I just Googled 'expensive shirt). At each step, the increase in price seems reasonably in tune with the increase in quality.
As far as I can tell, there are only two exceptions to this rule of variety and price:
1) Athletic shoes. The more they cost, the more hideously ugly they are. Unless you like wearing space ships on your feet.
2) Mens' coats. There is no middle-range quality here. Functional, unattractive coats (the kind I wear) can be had for $60 or less, and nice ones cost a lot, lot more. There seem to be some coats priced in-between, but to get improved quality I think you have to jump from the $60 all the way to $150 or $160.

"God bless us, every one!" said the atheist, quoting Tiny Tim.

My recent bed-time reading has been Stephen Hawking's "A Brief History of Time." I've been reading other things, too, but I usually finish my night with 7 or 8 pages of Hawking's book.
I sometimes think about skipping ahead to see how it ends- but I'm afraid it will give me nightmares.

The Guarantee

In answer to Dad's inquiry, my bowl picks come with Santa's ironclad guarantee. If you have been very, very good this year, then I have provided all winners. If you headline the 'Naughty' list, with your name highlighted and underlined and destined for a lump of coal (or designated for being pretend-kicked by six to eight black men, dumped in a sack, and carried off to Spain) then you get no winners. If you were just okay this year then they are half-right. And so on.

My Bowl Pick 'Em Picks

EagleBank Bowl was not included in the contest since participants weren't determined until yesterday.
It is the standard bowl contest- pick winners of all games, rank games 1-33 in order of confidence, most points wins. I expect to become very wealthy as a result.

And these geniuses have won 25 straight?!

After reading elsewhere about possible recruiting violations by the Tennessee football program, I again surfed over to the Knoxville News Sentinel. This poll question- and the possible answers- caught my eye.


I would like to suggest a couple of others:

Was Lane Kiffen's first season successful?
A) Tuesday
B) Cheeseburgers
C) Hostesses

Is Tennessee Orange the ugliest color in the universe?
A) Definitely
B) Bruce Pearl
C) Rocky Top

I'm a perfect six-for-six aganist the spread on this season's UK football picks, but there will be no Big Blue football game prediction this week.
Though I've devoted my usual 14 hours (or more accurately, 6 minutes)to handicapping the Big Blue game and as usual I have run all the numbers through my custom handicapping program on the super computer, I will be unable to publish the result.
I apologize for this failure. It is due to some sort of glitch in the software, I'm sure, but I have as yet not succeeded in fixing the glitch. I've run the numbers again and again and again, and each time the results say I should take Tennessee and give the three points.
There's obviously a problem somewhere if my numbers say to take the Vols. I mean, when was the last time they won this game, anyway?

In desperation I consulted another source, one that has proven infallible in the past. Ten times I asked the question "Will Kentucky beat Tennessee tomorrow?"
Answer 1 was "Ask again later."
Answer 2 was "Definitely."
Answer 3 was "No way."
Answer 4 was "Maybe."
Answer 5 was "Definitely."
Answer 6 was "Definitely."
Answer 7 was "Definitely."
Answer 8 was "No way."
Answer 9 was "Absolutely."
Answer 10 was "My sources say no."

So: five positives, 3 negatives, 2 non-committals.

____________________________
The folks at the Kentuckysportsradio.com blog have done their usual terrific job. A couple of my favorite lines for the day...
Description of basketball coaches Bruce Pearl and Pat Summitt (with accompanying great photos): " Two of Tennessee’s most famous cheerleaders: One is built like a burly old man with a hairy chest, that creepily hits on women, drinks heavily, and should never be photographed topless. The other is Bruce Pearl."
and
Scouting report on recently arrested player: "No, that’s not a touchdown the officials are signaling for. Jackson is just holding them at gunpoint."

The Big One- Five-O

"The Origin Of Species" was first published 150 years ago today.
I am celebrating by browsing the "Answers In Genesis" web site. I have no idea why, but it is great, great stuff. There is nothing quite as entertaining as someone else's stupidity (as opposed to my own stupidity, which I never think is very funny).

What did I learn while visiting? Lots! I received confirmation that our planet is six thousand years old.

I learned that evolutionists don't really know how old dinosaur bones are because the bones did not have labels attached when they were dug up. Also, the evolutionists weren't actually there when the dinosaurs died, so how could they possibly know? The evolutionists just made up the story to make it fit with their pernicious theory.
Those silly evolutionists, always trying to trick me. I'm too smart for them though- I've seen "The Flintstones," so I know better than to assume people and dinosaurs never lived together.

I don't know exactly what I just did, but I believe my most recent post just disappeared. Several things were occurring all at the same moment- I was having trouble with the web site and trouble with my nearly-spilled cola, and also right at 7 pm, in the midst of the trouble, my antivirus software started a scan and froze things for a moment. Anyway, something happened.

So, I'll sum it up: Go Cats! Huge win! I'm excited!

Now I'll move on.

The scramble was a lot of fun yesterday. We played well. Brian and Jim hit plenty of good shots, John was solid, and I even contributed a few useful shots. We finished 3rd out of 40+ teams.
No prize, though. What a ripoff. All we got out of the lousy deal was a really fun day and the chance to donate to a worthy cause. Darn it.

I'll have no prediction on the UK/Tennessee game until Friday or so, but a simple comparison of scores vs mutual opponents doesn't look promising. I'm not a big believer in such things anyway, but they do have six common opponents and UT fared better (at least in terms of margin) against 5 of them. That seems significant.

This chili is rated PG-13; some adult content, intense themes which may cause tears, also elicits strong language.

Weekend predictions
-The Cats will probably lose to the Dawgs, but I'll take the points and UK.

-Louisville plays somebody, right?

-I'll take Michigan and the points over Ohio State in a scenario similar the one above.

-There are a couple of big PAC-10 games but, eh, I dunno.
___________________________________________________________
I watched "It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia" the other night and the opening segment absolutely cracked me up. I've now watched the clip of it (posted at right) about a dozen times. It still cracks me up.

____________________________
I encountered difficulty getting this post to publish because of an unclosed tag. Interestingly, I finally determined it was because the symbol for 'bolding' the script includes the word 'strong' and I also used the word 'strong' in my caption. I think that was messing something up.

Latest Wagering Exploits, or...

(alternative title)
How I Learned To Stop Winning But Keep About Breaking Even

My bulging account balance has been burning a hole in my cyberpocket; I've placed bets on about eight or nine races this week.

I lost about $25 total Sunday through Thursday.

Friday I bet on two races and came out a whopping $5.80 ahead. One horse I especially liked- was quite excited about, really- was 6/1 morning line odds and won, but his odds dropped to 7/5. I guess everyone else saw the same thing I did.

Today after work I scouted some races as I watched football. I eventually found a race I liked and won $25. That encouraged me to bet another, which in turn led me to give back six of my recently won dollars.

Factoring in the wagering fees I'm about $3 behind since Saturday. This high stakes gambling is heady stuff, but at $3 per week I guess it beats the garbage on television. Except for "Heroes" and "The Office," of course.

And I'm actually following my old familiar pattern. Twice a year- Derby and Breeders Cup- I make a lot of bets for a couple of weeks and then kind of forget about it.
If I know me- and I don't- I'll go on a cold streak, lose $40 or so over a week and a half, and then not bet on a race until Keeneland reopens in the spring.

Heist of the Century

I visited Knoxnews.com searching for details regarding the arresteded Tennessee football players.

According to the story, the alleged victims say they were sitting in their car when two men in black hoodies opened the door, brandished weapons, and said "Give us everything you've got."

From that point on, the story is about as comical as an armed robbery can possibly be:

"I could just tell he wasn't going to shoot me. He didn't have too much authority," Zickefoose said.
The victims said they showed the two men their empty wallets and said they had no money.
"I said, 'Sorry, we don't have anything to give you.' " Zickefoose said.
"We ain't got nothing but a cheeseburger," Smith added, "but they didn't take that."
A third man then approached the car and told the other two men in hoodies, "We've got to go," DeBusk said.
The three men got into a 2010 Toyota Prius driven by a woman and fled the area. Zickefoose said he glanced at the Prius during the attempted heist and noted the woman seemed amused.
"She was smiling, with a big grin on her face," Zickefoose said.

I played golf at Covered Bridge today. I hadn't touched my clubs since a scramble in August, and I had not played my own ball since July. If my gambling success swelled my ego then I guess golf was the perfect remedy. I shot a 46-49, and that was with pretty good putting.

Actually, I was quite happy with it. My driver and irons were the same as they were months ago- lousy- and my putting was fine. The only part of my game that stunk was my chipping and wedges from 30-80 yards or so. I actually struck those shots okay but my distances were off. Unsurprising, I guess.

Before I left this morning I placed one bet on a horse race- just in case I was still lucky.
I wasn't. My 3-horse exacta box ran 2nd, 3rd, and last. Still, I think I was right to try it. I'd hate to still "be walking around lucky and not even know it."

Good Golly I'm Hot Today

Wow. I woke up still giddy over my weekend winnings.

And this morning it got even better. Last night I logged in to check my wagering account balance, and while I was on I went ahead and placed a $6 wager on the Oak Tee Derby. Then I became distracted and completely forgot about it until a few minutes ago, when I discovered I hit the exacta and it paid $40.

My Breeders Cup Picks

Would you rather take advice from Bad Bob or from the guy who doubled his investment today (me)?

Juvenile Turf: Pounced
Turf Sprint: Get Funky
Sprint: Dancing In Silks
Juvenile: Pulsion
Mile: Zacinto
(If you want a big payoff, your Mile 4-horse trifecta box is Zacinto/Justenuffhumor/Goldikova/Court Vision)

Dirt Mile: Mastercraftsman
Turf: Conduit (long shot= Monzante)
Classic: Einstein

My dream night before last was apparently punishment for my ‘Bah, Halloween’ comments. It was not a nightmare, by any means, but it sure turned out to be a disappointment.

It was a duel-topic dream, the topics being haunted houses and creative writing.

The dream began with a hackneyed, Scooby Doo/Ghost Hunters/Blair Witch scenario in which I attempted to spend the night in a haunted house. Then I was in some sort of creative writing class discussing my short story about people spending a night in a haunted house. Then I was back in the haunted house. Then I was in the classroom again. And so on.

It occurred to me (in the dream) that I could apply this vividly imagined haunted house to my story. I was switching back and forth between the haunted house and the classroom, and at each stop in the classroom
I feverishly wrote all the details of the ghost story I could remember, and I was really on a roll.

It fleshed out into a fantastic story with what I thought were lots of cool details. The house was tiny and clapboard - the former home of Poe, at one point, and then I think it became the home of some heinous criminal- but preserved in the middle of an otherwise modern neighborhood. I came up with what seemed a plausible reason I and two other people (both hot chicks, of course) would be investigating this haunting, and also with some sort of very sinister plot that would be foiled by me.

Anyway, when I woke up I thought ‘yeah, that was a cool story.’ But when I tried to piece together the details I realized there were very few, and that it was really, really stupid. I thought I developed a neat, highly-detailed plot while sleeping, but it was mostly just gibberish. Shucks.

_____________________________________________________________________________
I finished “The Wordy Shipmates” the other night. It was so-so. I was a little disappointed.
Thanks to three recent bookstore excursions, I now have a small pile of attractive books to tackle over the next month or so. It’s a good mix of weighty stuff and escapism.

I’ll probably be reading quite a lot. Colder weather and earlier sunsets lead to more reading, plus I’ve finally made up my mind to rest my aching knee. I believe I’m just suffering from tendonitis, but it got worse and worse as softball season went on. By the end of the season it was impossible to ignore.

I’m fairly sure I just need to take it easy. After the season ended, and a couple of times since then, I’ve noticed that 3 or so days without strenuous use makes it feel a lot better. But then I keep aggravating it again. This time I’m going to go 3 or 4 weeks and I expect significant improvement.

Or Not...

Okay, the Wildcats definitely did not handle that running back very well.
Also, though there are still a couple of undecided contests, my SEC picks didn't do very well.
However, I did keep my perfect Wildcats point spread record intact.

_______
Sunday morning update. I ended up with 3 wins, 3 losses, 1 push.
Boo. And not a Halloweeny, ghosty 'Boo,' either, but more of a 'That stinks' kind of 'Boo.'

I'm Prepared

I had no trick-or-treaters last year and expect none this year. I assume nobody bothers knocking on the door of my cheap little apartment because all the much nicer houses nearby look like they'd have a lot better candy.

I like to be prepared, though. Therefore, I just took an inventory of my available treats. If any lucky children come to my door, here is what I can give:

-Claritin
-Halls cough drops
-fruit-flavored antacids

If I run out of over-the-counter medicinal items I suppose I can also hand out my "Mr. Boston Bartenders's Guide." After all, I haven't mixed a drink in several years.
I can also part with my used copy of "Ethics Without God." It's a pretty good read and may set some kid straight. I also have TWO copies of "Moby Dick," both of which would make good treats.
And if all that is not enough, there are a few old text books that I have intended to take to "Half-Price Books" for a while now. So some lucky little Harry Potter, SpongeBob, or Hannah Montana could walk away with either "A History of Civilizations" or "Classical Mythology" in their goody bag. I might even throw in "The Charterhouse of Parma."

Bah Great Pumpkin?

What a rotten, rotten week. It's been a long time since I was this glad it's Friday.
And hey, there's an extra hour this weekend. Yay!

I can do without Halloween, though. Well, that's not true, exactly. I think it's a really neat holiday for kids, but I have never quite understood why anyone would like it other than for kids.

Interestingly, I find the effect of looking at Halloween photographs to be exactly opposite that of looking at Christmas photographs. Halloween party-goers are hot and itchy in their costumes, the parties are fairly lame and unfun, and it's just generally never too great. But the pictures are really neat and make everything appear much more enjoyable than it actually was.

Christmas pictures, on the other hand, are actually incredibly dull. They show mostly overfed, smiling people surrounded by shredded wrapping paper. They really don't reflect how pleasant the holiday is.

I wore my old man mask to work today (the same mask I've worn periodically since approximately the turn of the millennium) and some people wore cool costumes, but mostly it was just crappy costumes, crappier decorations, candy, and the 5th lousy day out of 5 for the work week.
_____________________________________________________________________________
Here are my SEC picks for the weekend. My picks are in bold lettering.

1) Ole Miss 3 1/2 Auburn
2) Florida 15 1/2 Georgia
3) Georgia Tech 11 1/2 Vanderbilt
4) LSU 35 1/2 Tulane
5) Tennessee 5 1/2 South Carolina
6) Arkansas 38 Eastern Michigan
7) Kentucky 3 1/2 Mississippi St.

I teetered back and forth on the UK game for a long time. I think there's a strong chance Kentucky will win but not cover the 3 1/2 point spread. I'm not overy worried about MSU's star running back- I think Kentucky can handle him reasonably well even if Micah Johnson is unavailable. But that running QB will probably cause headaches.
I also took LSU, but it makes me nervous giving Tulane more points than LSU has scored in a game all year.

Quick FB Handicapping Recap and More TV

2 and 2 on my picks. 3 and 2 if I count the over/under on UK. Mediocre handicapping performance.

My worst pick was BYU/TCU. I had a bad feeling about that pick all day, too. Temporary stupidity last night caused it. My worst/best omission was Bama/Tennessee. I must have told a dozen people this week that it would be a close game. I should have included it.

______________________________________________________
I've been watching 'FlashForward' on Thursday nights. I'm hooked and will probably watch the whole season, but I'm not sure why.

The show is really not that good. It's a teriffic idea and could be a tremendous show, but it's only mediocre. It is one of those shows that- now that I am watching- I have to know what happens next, even though I suspect it will be fairly predictable and not at all satisfying.

Non-UK Picks

I'm branching out

No prediction for the the Kentucky game tomorrow. It scares the heck out of me and I can easily see anything from a loss to a 30-point win. The only posted over/under I found was 47 points. I'll take 'over'.

Since I'm not publishing my UK prediction, I'll instead branch out and select four other college games. These picks come with my usual money-back guarantee*. The odds are according to Lasvegasinsider.com.

I'll take Ohio State over Minnesota and give the 17 points. The Buckeyes are overdue for a huge effort.

I'll take Ball State and give Eastern Michigan 5 1/2. I don't know anything about Eastern Michigan, but they must be really, really bad if Ball State is favored.

I'll take Ole Miss and give Arkansas 7. The Rebels are not as good as preseason predictions but not as bad as their current reputation, and the Hogs have to be getting worn out from their recent big-game gauntlet.

I'll go with BYU over TCU - that's a pick 'em.

*Guarantee not valid in the U.S., Canada, Mexico, The United Kingdom, France, Germany, China, Russia or any of the former Soviet states, Japan, any nation that is, has been, or ever will be at war with Japan, any nation currently hosting U.S. troops, or any nation that has at least one computer with an internet connection.

Sports, Television, Books

*I read that the SEC suspended an officiating crew because of poor performance. It's the crew that stunk up both the LSU/Georgia game and the Florida/Arkansas game. The refs will not get another assignment until November 14. Does anyone doubt they'll draw the UK/Vandy game?

*I believe the last three episodes of "The Office" are just about the funniest shows I have ever seen.

*My last trip to Half-Price Books I bought two novels by authors I'd never read. Both were selected via perusal of back-cover blurbs- which is not a method I usually use.
It worked out okay. "The Hot Kid" by Elmore Leonard was pretty good. Not fantastic, but I enjoyed it.
The other was Richard K. Morgan's "Altered Carbon." Eh, it was okay, I guess, but not my cup of tea.

*"The Bourne Identity" was a very enjoyable read. I was pleasantly surprised. The plot varied quite a lot from the movie. I was not previously aware that the novel was 35 years old. That alone was enough to make the plot very different; pay phones, hand-writing recognition as a security method, and references to green text on computer screens all made for a very different spy world than the one inhabited by 21st century Bourne.

*I finally bought "The Wordy Shipmates."
Yes, Mom, you'll get it as soon as I finish it.

What the...?

For the last two years I have used a minuscule vacuum cleaner. It was not very good but just barely effective enough for my haphazard housekeeping. Thus I have had the intention of buying a full-sized vacuum cleaner for 6 months but did not get around to it until this week.

Most of the assembly was easy- except for the very first step. The instructions said to screw the handle into the main body of the cleaner, and it went on to say that the screws were taped to the back of the handle.


The screws were not there. They also were not taped to any of the other parts. I was getting seriously p.'d o. (how come people say p.o.'d? It's not 'offed.') when, while checking the handle for the 27th time, I heard a rattle.

I looked in the hollow handle and discovered that the screws were taped inside it, way up in the bend and decidedly out of reach of my fingers.
I marked the picture in red so you could see how far up the screws were stuck. And as a bonus, the fuzz on the floor also shows how badly I needed the vacuum cleaner.

I worked at it with a long screw driver for about 15 minutes before getting the screws out. Every two minutes or so I came close to throwing it all back in the box and returning it. I could have used my own screws, of course, but I was angry.. Still, I kept thinking 'one more try.' Finally, I pried up the tape enough to shake the screws out.

And now it is all assembled and works fine. I even vacuumed out my car. Once every five years is enough, right?

This particular Bissell vacuum cleaner either has the worst-ever parts packaging idea, or someone on the assembly line was having some fun.

I Never Have A Camera When I Need One

I just saw Dad's bird feeder picture and it reminded me of what I saw the other day. Friday afternoon I was stopped at a red light, sitting right next to the Bowman Field/Le Relais parking lot. I was staring straight ahead, mostly zoned-out as I waited for traffic to start moving, when out of the corner of my eye I saw something fall very, very fast right outside my passenger window. Startled, I jerked my head around (quickly enough that it hurt a little) to see what it was.
After a few moments I spotted a large hawk a dozen or so yards away. He was grappling with (okay, mauling) a chipmunk. I assume he speared the little critter right next to my car and ended up where he was after veering out of his nose-dive.

Wooooooo Hooooooooooooo!!!!!!!

I'm very happy about Kentucky's win. It was huge. Huge. Huge. It means a lot for the program. More than even the players realize, probably.

Kentucky had every reason to fail and found a way to win. That was great.

On my way home I heard a statistic that astounded me. Kentucky's 3 starting linebackers had 38 tackles. That's phenomenal. Wow.

And:
Why does Steve Ortmeyer still have a job? How many blocked kicks does it take to lose the special teams coaching job? At least his return team players haven't run into the punter every other time like the last 2 years, but UK's special teams blockers still suck.

Kentucky puts the 'special' in special teams. That unit rides the short bus to school and licks the windows.

I have high expectations. The QB situation is still very up in the air, but tonight Cobb and Locke proved conclusively that the Wildcats have 2 absolute SEC offensive stars, which is 1 more than Kentucky's ever had in my lifetime. Don't ask me to explain the math, but 2 stars make the offense about 5 times more effective than 1.

The Cats' 3-3 record looks awfully good with the schedule they have remaining. I now expect 7 wins, with a strong possibility of 8.
Plus I'm 4-0 vs the spread (I think my 4 picks are a total of 15 points off) this year and 4-0 picking straight winners. Not bad. And my overall game scenarios have been pretty spot-on as well.

I watched Big Blue Madness. Lots of hype and sloppy basketball. Yaaaay Kentucky!
Then I watched some baseball. Booooo Yankees!
Then I visited Mark's art store. Yaaaay Mark!
I would have bought something but I don't have any money. Boooo poverty!

So I guess I'll just post my football prediction and call it a night:

UK 27
Auburn 26

That's going way out on a limb, I know. I just have a feeling.

I think last week's loss to Arkansas was the beginning of a big let-down for Auburn that will see them stumble this week. They'll struggle some and make some dumb mistakes, and for once UK will capitalize on them.
I think UK will use all 3 QBs, but settle on either Fidler (probably) or Newton almost exclusively in the 2nd half. None of the three will look too great, but I have a feeling Kentucky will somehow come up with 2 or 3 really big plays that will make the difference.

A Work Complaint- with very few specifics so as to protect the innocent (me):

The last year has seen some personnel changes in the powers-that-be. The powers-that-be have initiated further changes. Things have gotten steadily worse, performance has gotten steadily worse, morale has gotten steadily worse.

The powers-that-be are sure it's the fault of us peons- even though things were going okay before and the only thing that has changed is them. Since it's not their fault, apparently there will have to be more changes. And I'm sure that will make things steadily worse. Or perhaps drastically worse.

The only comfort is knowing that- eventually- changes will be made that will bring procedures and routines and rules back in line with where they were a year or so ago. And at that point the powers-that-be will take credit for the improvement.

I used to wonder why so many people in positions of power are idiots. But as I got older and wiser I realized that despite appearances, the percentage of powerless idiots is actually much greater. The idiots with authority just stand out a lot more because they are in position to do so much damage.

According to Vegasinsider.com, Kentucky is a 13-point underdog against South Carolina tomorrow.

I can't quite bring myself to predict a victory, but I really like the idea of taking the points.

I expect a tight game with both teams scoring in the 20's, and Kentucky could very well win. However, after running my complex score-picking logarithm through the supercomputer, I say:
Gamecocks: 26
Wildcats: 24.

One of Those Days

Today I...
*started my day with a gulp of spoiled milk,
*misplaced my work badge, which I need to swipe to get in the building,
*had a generally bad day at work with numerous problems cropping up,
*broke a glass in the kitchen sink.
*ruined my gourmet dinner (actually, burned my grilled cheese sandwich because I was busy picking glass shards out of the sink), and
*tried three times to comment on Mom's blog, but for some reason I can not. Perhaps I'll try again later.

Plus the rain is no fun. And of course my bathroom light burned out.

Finally, after I ate my dinner of burned grilled cheese, I was ready to sit and read and move as little as possible- because I was operating on the theory that if I don't move the rest of the day nothing else will go wrong.
But I sat about 3 minutes before remembering I'd left my rent check in the car and I really needed to mail it today. So I had to go do that.

The postman delivered
A "past due" bill notice
The alarm clock rang two hours late
The garbage man left all the trash
On the sidewalk
And the hinges fell off of the gate
And this morning at breakfast
I spilled all the coffee
And I opened the door on my knee
But the last thing I needed
The first thing this morning
Was to have you walk out on me

-Willie Nelson, "The Last Thing I Needed First Thing This Morning"

Now I'm back and resuming the 'do nothing' plan. I'll finish reading "The Bourne Identity" tonight and make a start on something else. I think I'll try "Altered Carbon" by Richard K. Morgan. I picked it up at Half-Price Books last week. It looks interesting.

I could get on the stationary bike, but I'm afraid I'll wreck.

MLB Records

Baseball fans love discussing statistics and records. I've heard lots of discussions about which records are least likely to be broken.

Most commonly mentioned are Cy Young's 511 wins, Dimaggio's hitting streak, Aaron's home run record (now almost certain to fall fairly soon), and a .400 batting average (which isn't even a record, so I'm not sure why it comes up).

Here's one that never gets mentioned: Connie Mack's 7755 games managed. Tony LaRussa moved into second place on the all-time list today. Now if he just keeps going and doesn't miss a game (and if my math is right) he'll pass Mack- in May, 2028.

What a historic day that will be as LaRussa's Seoul Black Tigers (까만 호랑이 to the locals) take on the Caracas Turpials in an early season contest that could well determine the World Series favorite. I like LaRussa, but I'll be rooting for the Caracas squad to whom I remain faithful after they leave St. Louis in 2021.

"Water For Elephants" was very good. Thanks to my wonderful parents for the recommendation (and loan of the book).

It was a great story. The only problem I had was with one of the blurbs on the back cover. It ruined it a bit for me (okay, not 'ruined' just put a damper on it). The publishers should have selected a non-spoiler blurb. But I liked it.

If I Was 6, This Would Have Been The Best Day Of My Life!

Yesterday morning I walked over to watch the inflating of the balloons. I didn't see much- I think they started a little late because of the weather.
Then this morning as I was reading the news I kept hearing a funny noise and couldn't figure out what it was. I finally realized it was hot air balloons. I stepped out to my porch with my camera and watched for awhile. They passed quite close as they were coming in to land.

This afternoon I took a walk at the zoo. Most of the animals were active- even the lions were walking around (watching the zebras and the little kids. It must be like living at a Sbarro but never getting to eat pizza).
The camels were actually the highlight of the zoo trip. They were right up next to the fence, eating leaves off the trees and chewing up the fence rails. Since they are usually lying down I tend to forget how big they actually are (very big) and how long their necks are (very long).

Post-game rehash again

Pitiful, overall. The Gators are much better than Kentucky, obviously. But they are much better than everyone else, too, so how come the teams UK beats or almost beat don't look anywhere near as pathetic as the Cats against Florida?

Kentucky's week was saved by the 3rd quarter sack. Tim Tebow's trip to the hospital means ESPN will replay that hit 1500 times this week. Endless replays of a nice sack beat the heck out of replaying a 30-yard run or a touchdown pass.

Three games into the season and I still have no clue whether Kentucky is any good. The flu bug they are certain to catch from Florida won't help. (I mean 'respiratory ailment.' I guess if you call it something other than the flu it justifies going out in public and passing it along. I've never seen so many people puking from a respiratory ailment. Who knew we carried so much undigested food in our lungs?) The defense seems to have decent speed and strength but no idea how to tackle. the offense looks brilliant about 1/4 of the time, and clueless the rest.

I had a very boring week. It was great!

I'm sure I'll miss softball by sometime around New Year's, but right now it was terrific to have no games. I tentatively planned to stay home every night this week. I didn't quite manage it, but that's okay; I had a good time at Joe's Wednesday night with Brian.

Since I did a glorious lot of nothing this week, I thought I'd post about tomorrow's massacre- I mean the UK/Florida game. However, after reading the Kentuckysportsradio blog (on my link list for quite some time now) I realized I have nothing to top it. So I recommend checking it out. The Florida game-related posts are all terrific. I think my favorite was "(Florida women)... are looser than Charlie Weis’s bathrobe on a Chinese gymnast," but there is lots of quality humor.

Since that site's wonderful bloggers have done my football work for me, I'll spend the rest of this evening reading. Then tomorrow I'll be a bit more active. Not sure what I'll be doing, exactly. The weather will be a factor, but I have a balloon festival next door, plenty of college football, and UK (and even UofL) playing tomorrow night. Plus Johnny Meyer's 2nd birthday party.

Oh, I almost forgot my game prediction: 45-13 Florida. It will be closer than that most of the game, but by that I mean Florida will be up by 17 or 20 very early and then the game will be close the rest of the way. I (like Dad) think Kentucky will probably play better. But the result will still be ugly.

I sure wish the Cats had a bye week after Alabama, rather than the 2nd week of the season.

And one more thing. Kentucky is 3 and 8 all-time against #1 ranked teams. Who wouldn't take that record?

Post-game Diagnosis

I am quite happy, though after that dismal performance I expect I'm in the minority among UK fans.

Since Brooks has been Kentucky's coach his teams have played one or two absolute clunkers per season. This was definitely one, and it was a victory. And U of L is not that awful. Kentucky will see better teams the rest of the season, but Louisville played pretty well, and Victor Anderson is the best running back the Cats will face this year.

Kentucky survived a day of lousy tackling and incredibly sloppy ball-handling. They have one or two games like that every year. I always hope those games come against either a team they manage to beat anyway, or against someone like Florida who would win no matter what. This time it came in a lucky win.

I'm pleased. I'd still love to see an offensive line that can run block and a defense that can put pressure on a third-and-long pass, but otherwise I'm okay with the game. I'm not too worried about the tackling or the ball-protection; at the moment I'm prepared to just call it an off-game with a fortunate result.

Also, I haven't been a big Pat Forde fan lately, but he deserves credit for his call this week at ESPN.com. It's not exactly a prediction, but here's what he had to say about USC/Washington.

... the following teams should be on upset alert (or at least scare alert) this week:

USC (11) -- The Trojans were a marvelous self-sustained energy force Saturday in The Horseshoe, jumping en masse and dancing and shouting to each other all game long. "We stayed with the juice on the sidelines," coach Pete Carroll said, approvingly. "It was 100 guys versus everyone in the world, it seemed like. We were just trying to create as much energy as possible. We needed every single guy jumping."

So what happens this week, when USC travels to Seattle to play a Washington team it has beaten seven straight seasons? A Washington team that went winless in 2008, including a 56-0 loss to the Trojans?

Will they be jumping all game long again?

Meanwhile, Washington finally won a game last week and is coached by former Carroll assistant Steve Sarkisian -- with former Carroll assistant Nick Holt as defensive coordinator. Rest assured, the Huskies and their coaches have had this game in their sights far longer than USC and will have the Trojans scouted right down to their sweat socks.

I'll redact that cornhole slander, then. I've played quite a lot of games with and against both players, and in my professional opinion it's easier to believe Brian won.

12:25? Not bedtime yet...

...but it's close.

The Yogi season ended with a split-doubleheader tonight, leaving us at 5 and 5 for the fall.
I think we stunk in the fall league. It was a darned good league and I'm not exactly unhappy with our record, but we played much worse in the losses than we should have done.

I'm not sure if I'm done for the year or not. I'm told I might be called to sub, or to play in a tournament or two, and I'll probably say yes. I won't put my equipment away yet but I'll assume I'm done unless I hear otherwise.

That's good news for my poor little brother. I hear he had sand kicked in his face in a cornhole game at Joe's last night.

Now I'll be willing to help you out, Brian, if you come across some beanbag-throwing bullies on Wednesday nights. I'm much more willing to help you out on Wednesdays if I'm not out late on Tuesdays and Thursdays. ( I can't believe you lost a cornhole game to Chris Rapp. I'm probably 100-0 lifetime against him. And he says he was partnered with Nick, who can't even throw a ball back to the mound straight from catcher. Jeeze...)

Giggity Giggity

UK/UofL Prediction Time

I'd actually prefer to put this off until Friday night, but I want to make sure my legions (6) of loyal readers have time to benefit from my profound knowledge and get to their bookies.

Wildcats: 27
Dirty Birds: 16

So with the betting line hovering at UK-13 it might be too close to bet the bank. I don't know the over/under but I'd imagine that my pick is also right on the line.

I think UK has a definite edge on both the offensive and defensive lines. I prefer our linebackers, too. Special teams are a toss-up. Even with Lindley, the defensive backfields are pretty much a toss-up. The offensive skill positions are still largely question marks, except Victor Anderson is a known stud for Louisville.

Still, I saw enough out of UK's QB and receivers to know they will not cause a defeat, and Anderson will face a tough challenge from UK's defense. The difference-maker will be control of the lines. UK wins.

As to how the game will progress, I'm guessing uglily. Is that a word?

Both head coaches have shown a tendency to start conservatively and feel the other team out before taking chances. I'd therefore expect little scoring for the first 20+ minutes. By then UK will probably have established field position advantage, plus perhaps a big play or two- either by the defense or by breaking a long gain from Cobb, Smith, or Locke.

Then the rest of the game will be controlled by the Cats. It won't be extreme domination but it will be definite.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot the big rumor of the day. Jon Gruden was spotted leaving Tom Jurich's office. Cards fans are excited.

I played 6 softball games yesterday. I admit I was a little (a lot) tired and sore today. But just a little (a lot). We lost in the finals.

It was a co-ed tournament. After the second game, I mentioned that the last time I played co-ed softball was 1987.
And my teammates started chiming in with:
"1987? I was in kindergarten."
"I was two."
"I was in 4th grade."
"I wasn't born yet."
and so on.

There was only one player close to my age. Our pitcher was a year younger than me. When he found out I graduated from St. X in 1989 he asked if I knew his cousin, John Evans.

"Evans?" I asked. "I don't think so. Oh, wait, was he a big goofy guy who decided for a while in the early 90's to become a skinhead and join the Michigan militia, or something like that? The last I heard of him he was living in a cabin somewhere in central Kentucky and sending crazy manifestos to all the newspapers."

Okay, actually, I said John is one of my best friends, and that regrettably I haven't see nearly enough of him the last few years, and I swore (yet again) to myself that I would rectify that soon.
And once Mike told me that John was his cousin, I couldn't believe I hadn't already figured it out. For one thing, I think I've met him once or twice over the last 25 years or so. Also, they look very much alike.

While driving to work Tuesday, the IMA (Integrated Motor Assist) light on my dashboard came on, and stayed on.

I took the car into the dealer Thursday morning. They checked it out, and told me I needed a new IMA modulator. I agreed I really did need an Illudium Q-36
Explosive Space Modulator, because the Earth was obstructing my view of Venus.
Then the guy said no, no, it's an IMA modulator. It modulates the amount of assistance the hybrid battery gives the engine.

I said Oh.
And then I said How much will that cost?

I found out today that the part will be in next week sometime, which is a little vague. But the good news is it is still under warranty and won't cost anything.

Softball goes on and on and on and on...

We won tonight to move our fall record to 4-3. It was a big win against a very good team.
I'm getting a bit tired and I'm not minding the idea of the end of the softball season, and yet...

This week I agreed to
A) playing in a Wednesday night league. I'm not fully committed. I've advised the team to look for someone else, but if they still need an infielder I might be playing with them through October.
B) a tournament Saturday at Turners. Brian, if you read this tomorrow, my first game Saturday is scheduled for 12:15. I'm quite willing to help you move, but the only time I can guarantee my availability is from 7 am to about 11:30. I hope that works, but I'd imagine I'll also be available all day Sunday.
___________________________________________________
Non-softball
Two months ago I got a new neighbor. His 25 square-feet of porch now contains a dozen plants, a couple of small tables, and a bird feeder ( I took a picture but haven't downloaded (uploaded?) it yet). A few of the plants are of a type I don't recognize, but there are 3 or 4 pepper plants and 3 or 4 tomato plants. Over the last month or so one of the highlights of my day has become the flurry of small animal activity that accompanies my arrivals and departures.

When I leave for work early in the morning not much happens. The critters are still asleep, I guess. But in the afternoon and evenings when I leave my apartment, I witness a burst of a dozen birds or so scattering from the porch. Then, as I round the corner, I almost always see a squirrel or two rooting around. They notice me and then scram, frequently making a spectacular 18-foot leap from the balcony to the nearest small tree in the courtyard. It's pretty cool- especially because I'm always surprised, and the frantic activity always catches me off-guard.

Still, it's nice to know that if the squirrels ever get on my nerves I know just who to call. The legend of the Squirrel Terminator strikes fear in the hearts of every fuzzy-tailed rat in the I-65 to I-64 corridor.

Books and Movies

I went out to Half-Price Books Sunday and was excited to see the 20% off Labor Day sale. I decided I would browse the music, movies, and books and try to find quite a few purchases. My goal was 4 books, 2 DVDs, and 2 CDs.

I must not have been in the right mood, though.

First, I only found 1 book that really interested me. I''ve just started Gregory Maguire's "Lost." I've read 3 or 4 others of his and I have high hopes.

I didn't get any music, but I bought two DVDs. I bought "Memento," which I've seen before and which seemed like a good movie to own. It's interesting, and it seems like the kind of movie that might reveal some missed details with repeated viewing, plus it's a good one to loan to friends. I also bought "28 Days Later." I just recently told Dad it was the only really scary movie I've seen in quite a few years. I'm hoping my brothers and I can watch it as part of a double-or-triple-feature Halloween-type movie night.

I finished "Lonesome Dove" this evening. It was better than I expected and not as good as I had hoped.

I put off reading it for several years because it did not seem too appealing to me, but Dad and quite a few other people recommended it. So my own preconception led to my low expectations, and others' high opinions led to the high hopes.

It was a good story and well-written, and I enjoyed it.

I do have to wonder about Dad, though. I sat in his living room a couple of weeks ago saying I'd just read five Cormac McCarthy novels that were all good but very depressing, and I needed a change-of-pace. And so Dad recommends yet another cowboy novel that is good but depressing.

League Champions? Bah!

An operator (me) error deleted my last softball post. I wish I hadn't screwed that up, because it's awfully relevant now.Four games into the fall, we are 1 and 3. It's a tough league, but we are playing so poorly that babies should flip us the bird.

I've never been the type to yell at someone. But I was tempted to do my best Bobby Knight tonight. We lost 22-5 and didn't show an ounce of life.

I sat out. And I suffered. It took a fair amount of effort not to scream at my teammates. There were very few signs of life from our side.

The other team was pretty good. We were listless and stupid. I thought this would be an opportune time to relax, check out new players, and give some other guys a chance to play. But I'm not sitting again this fall. I can't make up a 17-run deficit, but there are obviously not 10 guys on this team who want to play more than me. So they aren't going to.

The game ended two and a half hours ago and I've gotten madder and madder. There is no excuse for a piece of &#@* performance like that. I have less physical talent than almost every player we had on the field tonight, but 10 of me would have won the game. That's incredibly frustrating.

I Already Have a 'Single Payer' System

The fanatical opposition to health care reform is the latest in a long line of weird behavior that fascinates me.

I am not espousing any health care plan over or any reform over any other. As with the financial debacle, I'm too ignorant of all the facts and of all the possible repercussions to have a solid idea I'd prefer. But I can not understand the knee-jerk, raving opposition to a single-payer system.

For one thing, it seems to work quite well in other places. Better than our current (lack of) system. Other western countries seem to be consistently rated higher than us in quality of care, and in cost.

Plus Medicare and the VA system seem to do okay. The argument that those government plans are in financial trouble doesn't carry much weight with me. It's true, but they also are run on a fraction of insurance companies' budgets.

The argument that they are wasteful is fairly ridiculous. If I make $50,000 a year and you earn only $20,000 a year, does the fact that I have $2,000 left at the end of the year and you are broke mean that you are 'wasteful'?

I'm sure there is plenty of waste in government programs. But I'm convinced they are no more wasteful than the average business.

Finally, I and most insured Americans already have a single-payer system. The payer is our employer, and we use whatever insurance company they decide to use, and pay whatever premiums and out-of-pocket expenses they decide we need to pay. And go to whatever doctors and hospitals are in their system, and get whatever treatment they say is reimbursable.

I am a long way from confident that our government could run this thing well. But when it comes to making sure I have quality health care available at a price that won't bankrupt me, I would not trust the government any less than I trust my profit-driven employer and their profit-driven insurance provider.

Of course, none of this matters because it almost certainly isn't going to happen.

This afternoon I went to the zoo for my walk. I planned to do more walking than viewing, so I didn't take my camera. I figured I'd only stop for a look at a couple of my favorite animals, but mostly just keep moving for a nice, hilly walk.

Then I ended up doing more viewing than walking. The animals are always so active on cool days. Of course, the zoo was extremely crowded, so I guess the animals might have been saying "the humans are always so active on cool days."
Anyway, here are the pictures I couldn't take. I hope you enjoy them. Overheard: Is that camel dead, Mommy?Caption: Don't jump, Mr. Orangutan! You have a lot to live for!
Wow, little Scotty should be renamed Big Willie. Put that thing away, son!



Hey, the human exhibit. Oh, wait, he's just a zoo staffer feeding the porcupine.

I wished I had my camera in the dayroom. The siamangs were really having a good time wrestling and swinging around. There was a handler in there with them, and I have to believe there couldn't possibly be a much better way to spend a work day than playing with the siamangs. It looked like a lot of fun.

One last thing:
I was next to the snow leopard cage when two little girls ran up. They looked at the leopard for a minute, then went to the sign. The older girl read the sign out loud for the younger's benefit (I'd guess they were 8 and 5 years old).
Then the parents showed up and stopped in front of the cat. They looked at it for a few seconds then the dad said, 'Come here, girls, look at this big tiger!'
The girls ignored him at first as they finished reading and the older girl answered a question (correctly) about the snow leopard's habitat.
The dad said again 'C'mon! Don't you want to see the tiger?"
"It's not a tiger, Dad," said the 5-year-old,
"Yeah it is. Right here on the rocks! Come here and see it."
"We've already seen it, Dad. And it's not a tiger. It's a snow leopard." She said this in a tone of voice that implied one word left off the end: "Duh."

The WORST Kind of Dream

This seems to happen to me 5 or 6 times a year, and I always hate it. A lot.

I dreamt I overslept. In my dream I woke up, snug and comfortable and lazing in bed, then suddenly recognized the bright daylight. I looked at the clock and saw that it was 9:30 already and I was very late for work. I jumped out of bed and rushed around to get ready, and nothing was going right.
As tends to happen in dreams, things were out of order...I was in the car rushing, then I was back turning off the shower and realizing I had no towel- my towels weren't all in the hamper or closet, they were non-existent. I cursed, then resorted to drying with a tee shirt. Then I was rushing out the door and back to the car again.
Then I woke up- for real- and checked my alarm clock. That happens a lot, and sometimes it can be a really nice feeling because I see I have an hour left to sleep. Few things are better.
This morning when I looked, though, it was 5:58. There wasn't a lot I could do with those 2 minutes.

Ho Hum, Another Night, Another Tournament Title

Some days I'm more thankful than others that this blog only has a dozen or so followers.

All day today I was somewhat sorry I posted that Pitino joke. I admit I still find it humorous, but I just now deleted it. My poor taste should not be subjected upon others. Not very often, anyway.

Anyway, I arrived at St. Martha tonight at 6:30, ready for a long, difficult evening. I was tired. Very tired. I lacked enough sleep, I was incredibly tight and sore from the long night last night, and I expected we'd be playing the same bunch of jerks we beat last Wednesday- and unfortunately they are a terrific softball team, so I figured we had our work cut out for us.

They lost the loser's bracket final, though, and we won the title with a 15-9 victory. Much easier than last night, but every bit as satisfying. We finished fifth in the Wednesday league, but won the tournament with victories over #4, #1, #2, and #3. I was thrilled. This was a great league with especially strong teams at the top.

We celebrated, but it was subdued. Everybody was worn out from last night. And we all seem to be hoping for rain Thursday night for our first fall game. Still, I'm generally looking forward to the fall.

We always pick up a new player or two for the fall league, and this year it looks like we've got a 3rd baseman and a shortstop. I'll move myself so we can check them out, which means I'll get a nice change of scenery for a while, and probably play a few games at 1st and a few at 2nd.

I'm looking forward to it. I always enjoy playing first base. I like scooping a few throws out of the dirt- then I say "hey, why was our scorer giving me throwing errors on this kind of play all year? They're easy!"

For those of you keeping score at home: I played in three leagues, won 3 league tournaments and two regular season titles. 5 out of 6 isn't bad. Not that I'm gloating or anything...

Win, Win, Win, Win. Yay. I'm Tired.

Sorry. I'm sure that's the most vulgar thing I've ever put on this blog and so I apologize. But how could I resist?

I played 27 innings of softball tonight. I'm tired.


We won 4 games and the tournament. I again don't remember many details. We won the last game 16-10. I remember that much. All four games were fairly close. We had a big 6th inning in the 2nd game to win by the 12-run mercy rule, the other 3 games went 7 innings.

I arrived home 25 minutes ago, showered, ate a bowl of cereal, and now I'm dry enough to go to bed.

One or two games tomorrow and one game Thursday.

Best Weekend of the Summer

Unfortunately, I don't usually notice things like this. I should probably pay more attention to when I'm having a good time because I would probably appreciate things more.

But for once I noticed. I had a terrific weekend. Easily the best of the summer, and I feel I've had a pretty good summer so it had some competition.

It started slowly but pleasantly. I was worn out Friday and had no intention of doing anything at all, and that's what I did. I fixed a good dinner, then read a good book for about 2 or 3 hours and went to bed fairly early. It was nice.

The first half of my Saturday was spent cleaning up a little and doing a little necessary shopping, and when I was done I felt a nice sense of accomplishment for a minimal amount of effort. That was nice, too.

I missed seeing Mom and Kim, but Saturday dinner with Dad, Mark, and the girls was completely pleasant. And then I went to Ron's Saturday night to swim and hang out with his family and Jim's family and we had a very good time (Though I should have eased back on my storytelling a little. Lauren Meyer was a little leery of jumping back in the pool after I told her about the sharks hiding under the rafts).

I lazed around a big chunk of Sunday, which is always wonderful. Then I really enjoyed Erin's birthday party (FIVE! You've got to be kidding me. If I didn't see how tall she was getting I'd swear she was just born a year ago).

Tonight was capped off by a terrific, tournament-winning softball game. We trailed 12-0 before we batted in the first inning but won 18-17 in the bottom of the 7th. Great game, and I played fine. I was 3 for 3 with a walk, and all three hits were with 2 outs and drove in runs. So I was quite pleased with myself.

And it's almost midnight but I've already arranged an 8:00-4:30 work schedule this week rather than 7:00-3:30, so again I'm quite pleased with myself.

I love good weekends. From now on, I'm going to make a point of noticing when I have one.

Softball Lowlights, and maybe I can scrape up a Highlight

Our Tuesday night dynasty stumbled. Our 16-0 regular season team now sits at 0-1 in the tournament and in the loser's bracket. To make it worse, we had to sit 3 hours waiting to play again before they called it a night because it was too late to start another game, and now we have to play at 9:15 Thursday.

If it wasn't our worst game of the year it was close. We led 6-2 after 2 innings and lost 9-8. No hitting at all. Awful.

At least it feels good to be such a big win for the other team. They celebrated like they'd won the whole tournament already, their sponsor was paying for their beer, and they were overheard talking about how great it was 'to beat those old guys.'

I was our third oldest player. And #4 is 4 years younger than me. So I did some quick calculations this evening and determined the average age of our lineup, and it's only 31. 5 years ago- before most of our REAL old guys quit playing- our average age was about 40.

I guess they had a point, though, because I was thinking "I can't believe we let these kids beat us."

Okay, here is the only highlight. It was pretty neat. We turned a triple play.

I don't think I've ever been involved in a triple play before. I might be wrong, but I don't think so.

Here is how it happened:
They had runners on first and second and hit a hard shot up the middle. Our shortstop dove, knocked it down, and flipped to the 2nd baseman, who turned a double play. The runner on 2nd actually dove back in to the bag because at first he thought the batted ball was caught for an out- then he ran on to third, where I tagged him out on a throw by the first baseman. Nifty.

Sleep disorders and Sleeping Injuries

As far back as I can remember, I have suffered frequent bouts of insomnia. Thankfully, they've been much less frequent over the last year or two. Nights of unexplainable insomnia have become almost non-existent; I have nights that take a long time to get to sleep, but they are usually the nights I was out at the ballfield until 11 and stopped at White Castle on the way home. So those are understandable.

Sunday night, though, was awful. I tossed and turned until 1 a.m., got up and tried to read some but soon felt I could try to sleep again. And tried again and then got up at 2:30 and watched some television and then went to bed at 3:15 and tossed and turned and never slept. Going in to work with no sleep was miserable.

Here's something that happened Monday afternoon that makes me think I might have been a bit delirious: I saw a package of Monet postcards on a co-worker's desk, and then a short time later I heard Eddie Money on the radio. The rest of the afternoon I had periodic fits of near-giggles over the idea of an impressionist rocker named Eddie Monet.

By the time I woke up this morning it didn't seem nearly as funny.

Of course, I was also in a foul mood when I awoke this morning because I had injured myself during the night.
I was sleeping on my right side and my right hand had fallen asleep under the weight of my body. I wasn't aware of this until I rolled over, caught my hand in the covers, and must have bent it incredibly far before I felt anything wrong. And then what felt wrong was the incredible pain in my hand. My right pinkie finger is pretty well sprained and swollen around the lower knuckle. Ouch ouch ouch.

I don't suppose the AMA has ever done a study, but I'd bet it is fairly rare to sprain something while asleep in bed.

(It ain't broke, it's just spraint)

According to "The Daily Mail," this ram caught his horn on a low-lying wire atop a hill, then ziplined down the hill. I think that's pretty funny.

_____________________________________________________________________________
We won two games tonight. I played okay and hit okay.

What's all the fuss about?

"On Point" did a whole hour on the fruitcakes who don't believe Obama is a U.S. citizen. I don't understand what the fuss is all about. Here's his birth certificate and it looks okay to me.

The birthday festivities finally ended yesterday with baked Alaska.

(Darn it. I asked for an image of baked Alaska and my graphics department gave me half-baked Alaska.)

As usual, it was fantastic. Still my absolute favorite. Thanks, Mom.

_______________
Softball Sunday: We won both games of a doubleheader. I hit well in the first game, which was a close win, and poorly in the 2nd, which was a blowout. So I'm okay with that.

I also took a ground ball too my wrist, which is now a pretty shade of purple. I get hit in the wrist at least twice a year. Apart from the face and crotch, the wrist is by far my least favorite spot to be hit. It's always in the same spot, right below (above? whatever) my palm, and it always smarts.
It was still an out, but I'm not sure how. The baserunner must have been loafing. The ball bounced about 10 feet in the air after it hit me, and the shortstop caught it and threw to 2nd for a force out.

Friday News Roundup

Local News:
My apartment is a mess and my milk has spoiled.

Slightly less local news:
A while back, during a conversation about the Seelbach fire, I learned the firefighters on the scene had to relay info on foot because the analog radios didn't work in the basement, but "they should be getting new radios soon."
That's been bugging me consistently since I heard it. Weren't new radios 'arriving soon' shortly after 9-11?

State news:
David Williams is still a complete jerk.

National news:
Little accomplished, lots and lots and lots of money spent doing it.

Entertainment news:
Michael Jackson is still deceased. And now buried, I think. Finally.

I wonder if any other big celebrities died this week. If so, there was probably no time for the 24-hour networks to cover it.

International news:
Our foreign correspondent has been detained and charged with crimes against his host country and so was unable to file a report.
In lieu of a report, just assume until you hear otherwise that the rest of the world has mad love for our new president but is unwilling to help us until they see what's in it for them.

Sports news:
Very near the all-star break and I have not watched a baseball game all year. That's a first.

Your beloved Yogis are a win away from clinching the Tuesday night title but are floundering helplessly on Wednesdays.
Injury report:
-two knees out
-one knee recovered
-one achilles tendon out
-one concussed head recovered (still attached)

Happy Birthday to Mark, and then other, much less important stuff

Brother, I wish you a very happy 40th birthday.

You are one amazingly hoopy frood, Mark. You are such a good dad and all-around decent person, and you are a really cool guy who is great fun to hang out with. What more could a brother ask for?

Plus you have an incredible wife and wonderful kids, so what's not to like?

(I haven't read any Hitchhikers' stories in a long time and I have no idea why the 'hoopy frood' phrase popped into my head, but it seemed appropriate.)

__________________________
Softball doubleheader info very quickly, then a quick bite to eat because I've just realized I'm very hungry, then bed:

We won both games, which is great.

Two more injuries, which is getting ridiculous, and also scary.

Jim couldn't play because he has somehow injured his knee without doing anything. It sucks to be old, I guess. I wouldn't know, though, because on my first swing after my 38th birthday I hit a triple.

Then tonight our shortstop collided with our left fielder and took a very frightening knee to the head. He left the game obviously concussed. (****I think he's okay, see below****)
At least it gave me another chance to show how very young I am. I played one inning at shortstop, started a double play to get the first two outs, then threw the next guy out at first. As a board member, I intend to do everything in my power to not play shortstop again so that my stat line at the position reads: one inning, three assists, zero errors.

Tomorrow has all the makings of a very ugly night. We play a tough opponent and will again be lacking lots of quality players. As a board member, all season I've been prepared to-and felt obligated to try to- get guys playing time at my expense. But instead we are struggling to field a team and I find myself playing three positions in one game as a result of constant juggling.

____ ***I posted this and then 5 minutes later realized I should provide at least as much info as possible on the concussed player: Jimmy stayed on the bench with ice until the game ended, then immediately left with his wife and kids to get himself checked out. I'd guess he will be fine but I plan on calling him tomorrow morning to check.
It was an ugly play on a shallow fly ball, and I feel sure it wouldn't have happened if I had been at third base as usual instead of first base. Neither fielder called the other off because neither was sure they had it, so they both kept going for it. Whenever I see that situation-and it happens quite a lot- I look and see who has the best shot and call the other off myself. But nobody said a word tonight.

Thanks for the birthday wishes. I had a wonderful birthday weekend.

Friday night I saw "Romeo and Juliet." I liked it quite a lot, despite the fact that folks in the neighborhood shot off more than a few bottle rockets that evening. Also, I have a sneaking suspicion that Mr. Shakespeare might have stolen some of his ideas from "West Side Story." I just wish Officer Krupke had been able to keep those dangerous poisons and weapons off the streets of Verona.

Saturday I went to Ron's cook-out. The weather could not have been much worse- most of the day was spent crowded in the garage. But they are wonderful hosts and we had a great time. We played a few rain-plagued games of washers, ate a lot, and saw a spectacular backyard fireworks show that wowed the kids. During the fireworks Lauren Meyer told her mom and dad "THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!" so I guess it was pretty good.

Sunday Jim, Ron, Mike and I played golf at Belterra, saw another fireworks show (I know my birthday is a big deal, but I was surprised by the number of people who celebrated with fireworks), ate a terrific buffet, and did well at the casino.

This morning we teed off late because of heavy fog and the wet course, then played 16 more holes before we had to call it quits and get back to town.

All in all we terrific time.
*******
Evening addition: Tonight, just as the post-4-day-weekend blues were hitting- I was taking care of bills and thinking about work tomorrow and worrying about a doubleheader tomorrow with lots of injured or unavailable softball players- Mark and the girls called and sang Happy Birthday. Ta-da! Blues gone.

Oh, and Mom and Dad and Brian called, too. But they didn't sing.

My Year In Review

The REAL birthday season is in full swing.

As each calender year ends, newspapers, magazines, and tv programs fill up with retrospectives. It seems appropriate to do the same as my own 38th full year ends.

Here are some of my year's highlights.

Best book I read in the past year: City of Thieves.
Best movie I saw in a theatre: The Dark Knight.
Only movie I saw in a theatre: The Dark Knight.
Worst movie I saw in a theatre: The Dark Knight.
Favorite television series of the year: Chuck (I know, it surprises me, too).

Best meal: the first chili of the fall. I don't remember it, exactly, but the first chili of the fall is always the best meal of the year.

Most memorable weather: Windstorm Ike made for one fascinating day and one heck of a mess.

Neatest day: Thursday of the ice storm. My ice-coated neighborhood was beautiful and the damage was quite impressive. I took a long walk that afternoon- it was very neat, and probably very stupid since I was walking on solid sheets of ice and in constant danger from the frequent falling of tree branches. Still, though..

Three things I learned this year:
1) Don't try to 'tough it out' when the power goes out in January. 20 degree homes are not really fit for human habitation.
2) An extended hiatus from golf leads to lots more free time and a larger bank account.
3) Every married person on the planet
___ a)assumes I must be miserable because I live alone,
and b)wants to fix me up with a girl they know,
and c)thinks we'd really hit it off,
and d)apparently believes that if I don't have a girlfriend/wife/whatever it must be because I'm incapable of attaining one without their personal assistance.

Sorry. That's been getting a little aggravating lately.

I weigh 11 pounds less than I did on my 37th birthday. So barring a binge-eating episode of historic proportions, when my birthday arrives in a couple of days there will be about 5% less of me than there was last year.

Biggest news events of Kevin's 38th consecutive year on planet earth:
*) Obama's election.
*) The Large Hadron Collider failed to destroy the earth.
*) The monumentally greedy were finally exposed as con artists. We all pay the fine.
*) Michael Phelps' 8 gold medals proved that smoking pot was a great way to toughen up the lungs in preparation for Beijing's pollution.
*) Militants kill nearly 200 in Mumbai. Lots of Americans learn Bombay is now Mumbai.
*) The post-election protests in Iran.

Three words I would love to work into a conversation in the upcoming year:
*metagrobolize: to mystify
*adiaphoristic: theologically indifferent
*obambulate: to walk around or wander

The Culinary Post

Culinary comment number one: Once in a while as I'm preparing a meal I'll see it on the stove or plate and think, 'wow, that looks good enough to be in a cook book.' So this time I took a picture.
I guess I am sometimes bored on Sunday afternoons.

And it tasted great, especially over the basmati rice (not pictured).

Culinary comment number 2:Yesterday evening's trip to Kroger was timed poorly. Never go grocery shopping when you are craving junk. The cart gets filled with salt and sweets that are best avoided. Still, it led to an interesting discovery.

The Tostitos brand queso is, in my opinion, sub par. I buy it from time to time, but only because of good product placement and my distinctly American weakness for cheese and corn chips.

Last night I bought both the queso and the Tostitos creamy spinach dip. The spinach dip is mediocre, at best. But the queso and spinach dip mixed together is fantastic. It has now passed the test two nights in a row, so I'll recommend it.
______________________________
Softball Doubleheader
Game 1: We won 18-3.
Game 2: We lost 19-18. Our first loss, and my first league loss apart from our inexplicable Wednesday night losing streak.
It was an interesting game capped by a very interesting finish. We had runners on first and second, one out, down a run in the bottom of the seventh when our batter was ejected for arguing a strike call on a pitch that hit the plate. The third base coach replaced him. He was stuck in a lousy spot- not loose, and stepping in with a 2-2 count and the game on the line- and he grounded into a double-play. Darn.
I don't usually blame an umpire for a loss, but this time I will. He made a lousy call and he compounded it by tossing a player who had a reasonable complaint and did not go overboard with his remonstrations. Our guy had his say and was done complaining but the umpire egged him on, which is inexcusable to me.

School Zones

Update first: we won Sunday, 9-7. We won tonight 16-0. So my team has yet to lose in the Sunday night league, the Yogis are undefeated on Tuesdays, and we've lost four in a row on Wednesdays. Interesting, because all three leagues are of approximately the same quality. We just find a way to lose on Wednesdays.

Before tonight's game I got a chance to review the season's stats, which were tabulated sometime this week. The main reason was just to review how much playing time everyone had received, but all the stats were there.

My numbers were way down, which I already knew. But I also noticed that both my fellow board members had suffered a significant drop as well. That was interesting, and it didn't take me long to realize there was a connection.

Until this year, all three of us just showed up, got ready to play, and played. This year we spend most of our pre-game time fretting over who has not arrived, who needs to get in, who can play what position, etc. We spend very little time thinking about our own games. The time I used to spend swinging a bat and more or less thinking about the upcoming game is now spent making out a lineup, or worse, on the cell phone tracking down late arrivals.

It shows in the stats. I feel better realizing that, but I'm still not sure how to overcome it.

Ha Ha

I can't help being amused. Churchill Downs built this big new casino, er, clubhouse, which is wired to the hilt and all ready for slots and video gaming, and they can't get the go ahead. Ha ha.

"No, I do not know what Schadenfreude is. Please tell me, because I'm dying to know."

-Homer Simpson

I don't like being happy about it, but I am. I think I'm a typical Louisvillian who is proud of the Downs and has a proprietary feeling about it. I want the track to succeed. I see it as more than just a business.
But Churchill management certainly does not see it that way. So screw them.

I'm befuddled by the lack of moral consistency, anyway. I always have been.
The state says it's okay to bet on horse racing and buy (state-monopolized) lottery tickets (and play bingo as long as you don't smoke), but all other forms of gambling are illegal.

And that will apparently remain the law, even though the governor and a sizeable faction of the representatives tried to adjust it to "a couple of other forms of gambling are okay, as long as it's done at a racetrack and some of the proceeds go to promoting horse racing."

I obviously have no problem at all with legalized gambling, but I also have no serious beef with people who believe it's immoral and should be against the law. I'm just confused by the state-sanctioned argument that a few arbitrary forms of gaming are okay and the rest are not.