The Guarantee

In answer to Dad's inquiry, my bowl picks come with Santa's ironclad guarantee. If you have been very, very good this year, then I have provided all winners. If you headline the 'Naughty' list, with your name highlighted and underlined and destined for a lump of coal (or designated for being pretend-kicked by six to eight black men, dumped in a sack, and carried off to Spain) then you get no winners. If you were just okay this year then they are half-right. And so on.